Failure

To say that I’m pissed would be a gross exaggeration, although I’m not really sure how to express my frustration without sounding like I’m whining.  Let’s instead say that my leadership is failing me and the rest of us in their decision making and they lack the professionalism to try and fix the situation in a logical and just manner.  To publicly go into specific details would be in violation of military regulations, so I’ll try to be vague as possible.

 

The old adage that goes, “Screw up, move up” applies in this situation.  Show that you are incompetent and the leadership will just push you off to an easier task so that you don’t screw anything up.  They’ll turn a blind eye to your abuse of privileges and they’ll even reward you with an above average evaluation, an award that you don’t deserve and they will send you home early from a combat zone to boot.  That should teach you a lesson!  Show that you are a hard worker and you’ll just get more work (most likely the work that the incompetent person couldn’t do).  You’ll get roped into areas outside of your lane and be held responsible for the mess made by other people.  Did I mention that you’ll get the same award and rating as the bungling person incapable of doing their job?  Plus, the duds will get sent home early while you stay a warzone and fix the problems caused by said duds.  What’s the point of working hard or showing that you care?  Is it the satisfaction you get by gloating how you do more than someone else does?   Is it to show that you enjoy being treated like crap?  Is it pride?  I’m not sure.  I do know that my leadership seems to reward incompetence and punish people who care enough to work hard.   

 

I’m not arguing for fairness because I know all too well that life is not fair.  I’m not looking for favor either as I know better than to work hard and expect something out of it besides the knowledge that I’m not a lazy piece of crap.  I guess part of me is looking for justice, equality, and for my leadership to make the hard decisions of holding people accountable instead of shirking their responsibilities to take the easy way out so they don’t have to deal with the weak.  Maybe I’m also looking for a little explanation of why they can’t explain to me the reasoning behind their decisions to screw the folks who work hard.  Is that too much to ask?  I understand that in the military that there are incidences where it is impractical to sit down with a subordinate and explain the reasoning behind important decisions.  If you are pinned down by enemy fire and yell at a maneuver team to charge an enemy machine gun position, the last thing you have time to do is sit down and explain why this task is important to the mission.  You just want them to do it, and do it well, and pray to God that it works without them questioning your orders.  To give a dissertation for every decision you make would be impractical.  But in situations where there is ample time and the lives of soldiers aren’t hanging in the balance, I think a good leader would take the time to explain the mission and the importance of a task.  I believe that a leader worth his/her salt would attempt to explain the reasoning behind a decision, especially if that decision is unpopular, so that the people who look to them for guidance understand what needs to be done.  A good leader would also treat all of his subordinates equally, rewarding good performance and addressing failures in the same manner.  People might not always like a good leader, but they will respect them if they have some insight to rationale of his/her decision. 

 

I think my problem is that this organization is lacking in the good leaders department.  I’m not saying that all of the leadership here is bad, but I continually see more examples of poor leadership rather than examples of good.  The belief that the leadership doesn’t care about their underlings is tearing down morale in this team.  All the work done by so many hard working individuals will be undone by the lack of strong leaders and this is a hard reality to swallow after giving up so much time to what I once believed was a good cause.  

 

It’s hard to keep a positive attitude on a day like today.  I ride that fine line between trying to understand that the hard decisions that are made by my leadership and feeling like they are force feeding me a line of crap to prevent them from having to do their job or hold others accountable for failing to do their job.